Tuesday, June 1, 2010

definitions: unihorn / move thtill!

It's double-definition tuesday:

(note: this first one is so obvious as to be almost not worth mentioning, except that for some reason it doesn't appear in any dictionary....)

unihorn - noun, an imaginary animal that looks like a horse or "maybe a doggie?" and has a single horn growing out of its forehead. Usually accompanied by at least one rainbow, some sparkles in the air, and with a flowing mane and tail of white hair.


me (digging through the jammy drawer to find something that K will accept for the evening): K, how about a t-shirt?
K: Daddy, look at me!
me (not looking): K? T-shirt?
K: Daddy, I'm a unihorn.
L: Thee a unihorn Daddy!

both girls are still naked in a post-bath kind of way, and it's been a struggle to get them to this point. Still, I know that if I attempt to force either of them into an unacceptable pair of jammies, things will go down hill. (Note: "knowing" this doesn't necessarily mean I won't end up doing this, but it's worth mentioning.)

me: T-shirt?
K: Daddy. I'm a unihorn!
me (finally looking over at her standing in the corner next to L's dresser.): You're a...?
K (holding up a chapstick to her forehead): A unihorn Daddy. I have a horn on my head.
L (realizing what her sister is doing): That my lipthick K. That mine!
me: Nice.
L (starting to cry now): I want my lipthick!
K (dancing around): I'm a unihorn!
L (really crying): I want my lipthick!
me: K, give L her lipstick please.
K: But I'm a unihorn Daddy!
L (near-total meltdown): K! I want my lipthick!!
me (going over to K): You're a nice unihorn. Now give L her lipstick.
K (taking the chapstick from her head and throwing it): Here!
L (china syndrome, making a smooth bedtime look highly unlikely): Whaaaaaa!
me (picking up the chapstick): Here, L. Now K, what are you going to wear to bed?
K: I want my lipstick Daddy!

move thtill! - instruction, always spoken with urgency, when someone/thing/animal needs to remain motionless for reasons such as you are giving them a fresh coat of toe polish.


K (in bath, naked and spraying the finger nails of my left hand with water from a rubber fish): Don't move Daddy. This is toe nail polish. It's rainbow polish.
me (waiting patiently, trying to ignore the overspray hitting my shirt and face): Ok.
L (also in tub, also buck naked, focused on wrapping a wash cloth around my outstretched fingers): Daddy, move thtill! This toe polish!
me: Ok.
L: Cause this important. This toe polish and I doing it like thith.
K: You mean hold still L?
L: Yeah. Move thill!
K (spraying her sister with the fish): That not right.
me: It's right enough K.
L (still wrapping my fingers with a wet wash cloth): Yeah K, it right enough! Thop it! Daddy, K praying me!

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