Friday, October 26, 2012

... and i'm running out of places to hide...

or, "we're just 2 teeth down (plus a third, fairly loose upper middle tooth) and the dream may be ending….."

too young for the truth?
K (in the morning while we were pushing to get ready for the Brain Cancer Walk): Daddy? Do you put money under my pillow?
me (at first unsuspecting, then slowly realizing what she might be asking about and fumbling): Uh… what do you mean ‘under your pillow?’
K (odd look): Umm…when I lose a tooth.
me (whew! getting to tell the truth!): Oh. No.
K (unknowingly going in for the kill): Does Mommy?
me (aackkk! and here I lie): No.
K: (somebody) said that he saw his mommy putting money under the pillow.
me (at a loss now): really?
K: And (somebody else) said that there’s no Easter Bunny.
me: Really?!? Wow.
K: I said there was.
me: Hmm…
K: Can I have a piece of candy in the car? 

It makes me sad to think ahead to when the girls will know that not only is the tooth fairy lives in their house, but so too does the Easter Bunny and Santa.... And L is only 4! Much much too young to have her excitement burst....

I try very hard not to lie to either of the girls.* It just feels like the best way to teach them to be honest is to be honest when I'm dealing with them. Of course I make mistakes, and I tried too to let them know when I realize that I've made a mistake. But this time was hard, and I haven't yet figured out what to do. I'll probably go with M's suggestion, made when I debriefed with her later: at some point when K is older and the topic comes up again, come clean, let her know that I lied and felt badly about it and apologize. 

*(or to M either, especially since I'm awful at it.)

1 comment:

Bev said...

For what it's worth, here's what we did: We explained that Santa lived in the "spirit of giving" and we were the messengers. For us, that was really the truth and it didn't spoil the fun of the tradition. In the end, we found that what they really cared about was the thrill of the tradition -- that they would find something under their pillow, under the xmas tree or behind the chair leg. In fact, they had a hard time NOT believing. An example: My daughter told me one Christmas morning, (she was about 13) that she had gotten up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom (she has to walk past the stairway from where the tree is clearly visible in the living room below). Even though she kept her eyes down, she said there was an incredible bright glow coming from the living room and in that moment she felt she was witnessing a visit from Santa! She immediately ran past and refused to look when she went back to bed. Even though she knew full well my husband and I brought the presents at Christmas, she was convinced Santa had paid a visit. To this day (now 25 years old) she swears she felt a kind of magic that night.