family: ... i just can't wait to get on the road again...

dispatch one from Walla Walla --

I'm sitting in the dark in the Marcus Whitman Hotel while in the bed next to mine two girls are refusing to go to sleep. So far today has consisted of getting up in order to start work from home at 5am, working until we left West Seattle at noon to pick up K and head east toward the mountains, driving for 5 hours during which a total of about 30 minutes of napping took place, and eating picnic food at a BBQ here in Walla Walla.

We've come to W.W. for one of M's class reunions. This is the second reunion of M's we've been to in 5 years, which is revealing. Me, I've not been to a single reunion of either of my colleges. Which is also revealing. (On the other hand, I've been to multiple high school reunions - that's what happens when you go to a school where your graduating class size was under 30.)

Our 5 hour drive over here can be captured in just a few lines of dialog:

K: How much longer 'til we get there?
L: How longer 'til we they-a?
me: A while yet. It's still a ways a way girls.
M: It's a long drive.
L: Ith a long dwive K.
K: I'm not talking to you!

Or, if you want the director's cut:

K: How much longer 'til we get there?
L: How longer 'til we they-a?
me: A while yet. It's still a ways a way girls.
M: It's a long drive.
L: Ith a long dwive K.
K: I'm not talking to you!
M: We're on the I-90 floating bridge, so we've been driving about 10 minutes.
me: Which means we've got a little way to go yet.
K: I'm tired of sitting in the car.
me: Me too!
L: Me too!
M (looking at me): I'm going to read my magazine.
me: ha ha ha!
M (pulling out her magazine): Hmm....
me: You were serious?
M (already head down and reading): Hmmm...
K: How much longer 'til we get there?
L: Dada, I thaw a plane!
me: Where L?
L: Up they-a.
me (not seeing it): Oh, yeah.
L: You thee it Dada? You thee it?
me: mumble mumble mumble...

... minutes pass ...

K: Are we almost there?
L: Ith a long way K.
me: We haven't even gotten to the mountains K.
K: Are we going to slide down the mountains?
me: No, we're going to drive up and then down.
K: Drive up the mountains?
L: Up the mountains Dada?
me: Yes.
K: I don't want to slip down.
me (realizing she's nervous about going straight up some mountains): There's a road K, it's like this one we're on now. It's just like this one.
K: Oh. (silence for a moment) How much longer...?
me: A while K. We aren't even to Issaquah yet.
L: We not to Ith-a-claw?
me: No, not yet.
K: I'm hot!
L: I'm hot!
M: You can take off your shirt.
K: No!
M: Ok.
L: Take off my thirt!
M (unbuckles, turns, helps the girls out of their shirts, sits back down, buckles back in). Ok?
K: I'm hungry.
M (quick glance over at me): What do you want to eat K?
K: I don't know.
L: I hungry Mama!
M: Graham crackers?
K: No!... Oh, ok.
L: Yeahyeahyeah!
M (unbuckles, turns, gets graham crackers for all the girls, sits back down, buckles back in).
K: I'm thirsty.
L: I thirthty too Mama!
M (unbuckles, turns....)
me: Getting a lot of that magazine read?
M (picking up her magazine): You are now it...

... much later-er ...

K: Are we almost there?
me: No, it's a long drive.
L: Ith a long dwive K.
K (yelling at her sister): No! Stop! I'm not asking you!
L: Ith a long dwive.
K: Mama!
M: What do you want to do?
K: Get out.
L: Get out-y!
M: We can't get out. We're driving 70 mph.
me: Hey, look over there.
K: What Daddy? What? ..... Horses! I see horses!
L: What? What?
K: Horses!
L: Way-er?
K: Back there.
me: They were back in that pasture L.
L (starting to cry): I didn't thee them Dada!
K: I'm cold. Mama, I'm cold.
M (unbuckles, turns, puts shirts back on girls, sits down, buckles up again)

Go back to "much later-er" and repeat multiple times, occasionally substituting "cows" for "horses" and "hot" for "cold"

... later still ...

L: I need to pee.
me (looking at M): I can pull over.
M: If we see a convenience store or something.
me: There's nothing anywhere around here. It's like Lewis and Clark just passed through a few weeks ago. Except for this road. And all the traffic. And the country radio stations.
M: So just like.
me: Pretty much.
L: I really need to pee!
M (looking back): Really badly? Or just kind of?
L: Weally badly!
M: Ok, we're almost there.
K: We're almost there?
L: Ith we almost they-a?
me: Yeah, almost.

... we arrive, manage to fit in a couple of pee breaks, go to a BBA where we drink a flat beer each, eat brats and potato chips and then I return to the hotel with the girls, leaving M to reune ...

me (in the darkened hotel room): If you don't go to sleep we won't be able to do anything fun tomorrow.
L: Whoa is Mama?
me: She's out seeing friends.
L: When is she going to come back?
me: After we're all in bed. Go to sleep.
K: What are you doing with your computer?
me: Nothing. Go to sleep.

... moments later ...

K: I'm thirsty.
me: Good night!
L: Dada, I'm thirsty!
me: Good night!

Go back to "moments later" and repeat multiple times.

Good night.